what to do?

my husband and i love Alaska. it is gorgeous. he has talked about moving but now he is getting serious. i just don't know what to do about it.

i love my job. he hates his. if we move there, will i be able to get a job? what about the kids? they won't have any family near by. can we survive? i hear that everything there is really expensive; living costs, food, what nots.

if i quit my job this close to the beginning of the school year and then he doesn't like the job in alaska, will i be able to find another job near here that i like as much as the one that i have now? ok. now i am getting an ulcer. any thoughts?

1 comment:

  1. If you get to a space of feeling good about taking the adventure, then my experience is that the other details tend to work themselves out in surprising ways. But it's always best to have both partners in a good space about it, because it can be a disaster if one partner goes against their gut feeling. My husband and I wanted to move to Hawaii, but I had a feeling that it wasn't the right thing. I wanted to support his dream, but I knew in my heart that it wasn't going to be a good idea. In the end it worked out really well for us to wait until we both felt good about the decision rather than try to force myself. We didn't end up moving there, and--although sometimes we still miss the idea of living in Kauai--we both agree it wasn't the right thing for us. (I had a friend who forced herself to go along with her husband's idea to move across the country in spite of her feeling NOT to, and it nearly cost them their marriage because she was miserable and resented the new life.) SOOOooo... that's a long ramble. But ultimately my advice (which is worth about 2 cents) is that it works better if both people feel good about the decision, and if you decide to do it, then jump in with both feet and don't worry. The details, jobs, etc... tend to fall into place when both people are on the same page and feel good about it.

    You only live once. I like to say "yes" to as many opportunities as possible. (Especially if you really want to do it deep down, and the only thing standing in your way is fear of how things will work out...sometimes the reason I hesitate on things is because I'm afraid, and when I go for it I'm usually glad I did.)

    When we've been in that position we do all the research we can, ask people who've done it, and make our pro/con list. And then ultimately, let your gut feelings be your guide.

    Whatever you do, have fun!